Archive for Respect
Thank you for joining me on this journey through The 5 Levels of Leadership. I’ve enjoyed sharing a sneak peek at my book and reading your insights into what makes an effective leader. Now we’ve got just one more week before the book comes out. I hope you’ll purchase and read it – not just for my sake, but because I know that the concepts within it can teach you how to grow as a leader.
Here’s a sneak peek at Level 5: The Pinnacle. I hope it inspires you to become the kind of leader who can eventually rise to that level:
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Rare is the leader who reaches Level 5—the Pinnacle. Not only is leadership at this level a culmination of leading well on the other four levels, but it also requires both a high degree of skill and some amount of natural leadership ability. It takes a lot to be able to develop other leaders so that they reach Level 4; that’s what Level 5 leaders do. The individuals who reach Level 5 lead so well for so long that they create a legacy of leadership in the organization they serve.
The individuals who reach Level 5 lead so well for so long that they create a legacy of leadership in the organization they serve.
Pinnacle leaders stand out from everyone else. They are a cut above, and they seem to bring success with them wherever they go. Leadership at this high level lifts the entire organization and creates an environment that benefits everyone in it, contributing to their success. Level 5 leaders often possess an influence that transcends the organization and the industry the leader works in.
Most leaders who reach the Pinnacle do so later in their careers. But the Pinnacle level is not a resting place for leaders to stop and view their success. It is a reproducing place from which they make the greatest impact of their lives. That’s why leaders who reach the Pinnacle should make the most of it while they can. With gratitude and humility, they should lift up as many leaders as they can, tackle as many great challenges as possible, and extend their influence to make a positive difference beyond their own organization and industry.
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P.S. October 4 is the actual date of publication for The 5 Levels of Leadership. I’d appreciate it very much if you would help get the word out. On Twitter, you can use the hashtag #5Levels. And here’s the link that you can share anywhere:
http://tinyurl.com/5levelslead
Thank you!
Leading difficult people: Grandstanding Gary
Posted by: | CommentsIf you’ve ever led a team, then you know how important good teamwork is. Professional basketball player Michael Jordan said, “Talent wins games, but teamwork and intelligence wins championships.” Jordan was an extremely talented player, but he understood the value of a good team.
If only every member of a team knew that… Do you have a team member who is more concerned with his individual achievement than the team’s? I call that fellow Grandstanding Gary.
Grandstanding Gary is the final person that we’re going to discuss in this series on Leading Difficult People. In past weeks, we’ve covered Fearful Fred, Slumped Susan, Excited Eddie, Disorganized Debbie, and Critical Carl.
Grandstanding Gary is the team member who plays to the stands. He wants to score the winning goal, and to make sure that everyone saw him do it. A talented, competitive individual can do a lot for a team, but for the team to win championships – to succeed in the long haul – all members need to cooperate and share credit.
As the leader, you need to understand Gary and teach him how to be a productive contributor to a team.
Understanding Grandstanding Gary:
- Behavior: Aggressive
- Motivated by: Desire to be #1
- Strength: Self-sufficiency
- Weakness: Lack of cooperation
Listening to Grandstanding Gary:
- Privately sit down to discuss Gary’s grandstanding.
- Ask him who he respects and why.
- Ask him to explain the value of teamwork.
- Point out areas where he’s not a good team player.
- Explain how that hurts him as well as the team.
- Find out if he’s willing to change.
Leading Grandstanding Gary:
- Lead from power and strength. If not, he won’t respect you.
- Ask him to take on projects.
- Reward him for teamwork.
- Decide which issues are worth the battle.
- Once an issue is settled, never give in.
Growth program:
Read The 17 Essential Qualities of a Team Player together
Ambition and competitiveness can be very good traits for a team member, but only if he or she knows how to function within the team. With proper guidance, Grandstanding Gary can be a high-energy and high-achieving employee.
The Right Thing 101
Posted by: | CommentsA few years ago, I published a book called Ethics 101. In it, I proposed that ethics was not a changeable thing, based on your situation or personality or industry. Instead, I explained that I believe that ALL ethics boils down to one thing: The Golden Rule.
Essentially, asking the question, “How would I like to be treated?” is an integrity guideline for ANY situation.
Think about it: How DO we like to be treated?
1. We want to be valued.
Did you know that in the American marketplace today, 70% of those who leave their jobs do so because they do not feel valued? Don’t you want others to accept you for who you are and show you through their actions that you matter?
Valuing others, not for what they can do but simply because they are human beings, is the foundation of ethics.
2. We want to be appreciated.
Closely related to the need to be valued and loved is the desire to be appreciated for what we can do. Don’t you want to excel and achieve? Knowing that what you do matters builds your self-confidence and self-worth.
How do we express appreciation? Begin by thanking people at every opportunity. Give credit to others. And make a point of praising people in the presence of those close to them, like family members. Broadway producer Billy Rose shrewdly observed, “It’s hard for a fellow to keep a chip on his shoulder if you allow him to take a bow.”
3. We want to be trusted.
George MacDonald said, “To be trusted is a greater compliment than to be loved.” Think about it: Good marriages, business relationships, and friendships all require trust. Without it, you don’t have open and honest communication, and the relationship can be only temporary.
It takes a leap of faith to put your trust in another person, especially someone you don’t know well. But as Henry L. Stinson said, “The only way you can make a man trustworthy is by trusting him; and the surest way to make him untrustworthy is to distrust him and show your distrust.”
4. We want to be respected.
When others trust me, I receive responsibility and authority. When others respect me, it touches something deeper within me. It gives me dignity and builds my confidence. As Arnold Glasow said, “The respect of those you respect is worth more than the applause of the multitude.”
The respect of a leader gives people the freedom to perform at their best and the incentive to work with excellence. I can’t think of a more positive working environment.
5. We want to be understood.
Charles Kettering said, “There is a great difference between knowing and understanding. You can know a lot about something and not really understand it.” Likewise, we can know a lot about a person and still not really understand them or why they do what they do.
But the desire to be understood is so strong that many disagreements can be resolved simply when one party (or both) gets the sense that they’ve been understood.
Understanding others means extending yourself and meeting them where they are. You must put the burden of connecting on yourself, not on them.
6. We don’t want others to take advantage of us.
We can cut through almost all of the ethical and moral dilemmas of life by observing this principle with others. If anyone could interpret what I do as taking advantage of them, then my actions are probably a bad idea.
What do you think of the needs listed above? Did I miss anything? And just for the sake of discussion, let me pose a question you can answer in the comments:
Describe a situation in your past in which a person in authority expressed value, appreciation, and respect for you. Why does that instance stand out to you? How did you respond?
Find more on ethics for all areas of life in Ethics 101.
R.E.S.P.E.C.T… What does it mean to you?
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A few years ago, I read an article about a young man who, at age 23, went to work as the senior pastor of his first church. He found the experience very intimidating because he was to be the spiritual leader of people who had children and grandchildren older than he was.
How did he handle it? By showing his people respect and asking them to treat them in kind. To make his standard clear to everyone, he shared ten rules for respect that he promised to live by, and he asked his people to do the same.
Here are his rules:
- If you have a problem with me, come to me (privately).
- If I have a problem with you, I’ll come to you (privately).
- If someone has a problem with me and comes to you, send them to me. (I’ll do the same for you.)
- If someone consistently will not come to me, say, “Let’s go see him together.” (I’ll do the same for you.)
- Be careful how you interpret me. On matters that are unclear, do not feel pressured to interpret my feelings or thoughts. It is easy to misinterpret intentions.
- I will be careful how I interpret you.
- If it’s confidential, don’t tell. If anyone comes to me in confidence, I won’t tell unless (a) the person is going to harm him/herself; (b) the person is going to physically harm someone else; (c) a child has been physically or sexually abused. I expect the same from you.
- I do not read unsigned letters or notes.
- I do not manipulate; I will not be manipulated. Do not let others manipulate you; do not let others try to manipulate me through you.
- When in doubt, just say it. If I can answer without misrepresenting something or breaking a confidence, I will.
His story intrigued me because I had faced a similar situation early in my career. The young pastor’s list reflected what I’d learned in my own experience.
Most people greatly desire the respect of their leaders. And when leaders give it freely, I believe it creates a very positive relational environment. As author Alfred Glasow said, “The respect of those you respect is worth more than the applause of the multitude.”
UPDATE: Many have asked who was the young author of the Rules of Respect in this post, adapted from my book Ethics 101. He is Charles Christian, who is still serving as a pastor in Washington. The article containing his rules was originally published in Leadership Magazine in 1999.
