Archive for Everyone Communicates Few Connect

May
23

Me and Michael, Jr.

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At the Gateway Men’s Conference last week, I sat down for an interview with the comedian Michael, Jr. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did…

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May
03

From my files: Connecting

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I’m in Atlanta this week, preparing for the Chick-fil-A Leadercast on Friday. This event will be broadcast to venues all over the world, and you still have time to find a location near you. Just visit the website for more information.

One of the things I’ll be talking about on Friday is the different levels of leadership. And one key to becoming a better leader can be found in connecting with your followers.

So for today’s post, I’m sharing from my files some of my favorite quotes…

On Connecting

Start where people are before you try to take them to where you want them to go. –Jim Rohn

There is no such thing as a worthless conversation, provided you know what to listen for. –James Nathan Miller

Shooting above people’s heads doesn’t mean you have superior ammunition – it means you are a lousy shot. –Oscar Handlin

The two words information and communication are often used interchangeably, but they signify quite different things. Information is giving out; communication is getting through. –Sydney J. Harris

When I’m getting ready to reason with a man, I spend one-third of my time thinking about myself and what I am going to say – and two-thirds thinking about him and what he is going to say. –Abraham Lincoln

Nothing can happen through you until it happens to you, and you can only communicate what you’re in the process of rediscovering. –Lloyd John Ogilvie

Before you can inspire with emotion, you must be swamped with it yourself. Before you can move their tears, your own must flow. To convince them, you must yourself believe. –Winston Churchill

Some leaders feel that by keeping people in the dark, they maintain a measure of control. But that is a leader’s folly and an organization’s failure. Secrecy spawns isolation, not success. Knowledge is power, yes, but what leaders need is collective power, and that requires collective knowledge. I found that the more people knew what the goals were, the better buy-in I got – and the better results we achieved together. –Mike Abrashoff

The true spirit of conversation consists in building on another [person’s] observation, not overturning it. –Edward Bulwer-Lytton

It’s not what you tell your players that counts. It’s what they hear. –Red Auerbach

I hope you found these quotes encouraging and helpful. If you want to learn even more on this subject, take a look at my book, Everyone Communicates, Few Connect.

Recently, I was asked a question that I hear pretty often.

Usually the questioner is young, perhaps newly-graduated from school. They’re almost always new to their current job. And I can often hear their frustration when they ask:

Please tell me, how can someone just entering the workforce create change?

Maybe you’re familiar with this question. Do you see a need for change in your organization? Are you frustrated because you can’t get anyone else to see it – much less do something about it? Maybe you’ve just graduated from university and gotten your first job. Or perhaps you’re a veteran worker, but newly-hired. Either way, it seems like a cruel joke.

As a new member of the team,

You see things with fresh eyes; you see problems that others might have just gotten used to. And if you’re young, you’re probably willing to take on any challenge.

BUT

You’ve also just joined an established group. No one knows you, so you have no credibility, no trust, no goodwill. You may have wonderful ideas, but how do you impress them on others?

What can you do to be heard?

You need to CONNECT.

Based on the definition I used when I wrote Everyone Communicates, Few Connect,

Connecting is the ability to identify with people
and relate to them in a way that increases
your influence with them.

Think about it: Where does change begin in an organization? With the people! So your ability to communicate and connect with others is a major determining factor in increasing your influence. And increasing your influence with them is your way of making change happen.

Here are some next steps to take:

  1. Keep in mind that connecting requires energy. You must be intentional – not casual – in your interactions. Devote the time and energy necessary, but DON’T steal it from the work you were hired for. The energy you put toward connection needs to be above and beyond what you’re already doing for your job.
  2. Focus on others. True connection is all about others. If you’re still working on making your agenda happen (i.e. creating change), that’s not connection; it’s manipulation.
  3. Work on finding common ground. When two people come together to communicate, each has a reason for doing so. To connect on common ground, you must know your reason and the other person’s reason, then find a way to connect the two.

All of this may sound complicated and roundabout when all you want to do get your goals accomplished. But you need to remember: Making a difference in your work is not about productivity; it’s about people. When you focus on others and connect with them, you can work together to accomplish great things.

Apr
30

Something fun for your weekend

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Only one week from today is a fantastic conference/simulcast: The Chick-fil-A Leadercast. I’m so pleased to be a part of a fantastic lineup of speakers, including Jim Collins (Good to Great), Tony Dungy (retired NFL Super Bowl-winning coach), Mark Sanborn (The Fred Factor), and Chip Heath (Made to Stick).

And while the conference will be live in Atlanta, Georgia, it will also be simulcast in many different cities worldwide.

(To see the whole speaker lineup
and find a location near you, visit Leadercast.com.)

Now, if you were at last year’s event, you might remember an “interview” between me and Tripp Crosby, one of the emcees.

Tripp’s parody video caught me totally by surprise, which is always fun. And it also made me look like an idiot, which I LOVED.  I enjoyed it so much that I posted it right here on my blog. (If you haven’t viewed that first fascinating interview, take a look.) A year later, I still get asked if I REALLY swim in a Snuggie. (No, I don’t.)

Well, my publishers, Thomas Nelson, loved Tripp’s comedy. So they couldn’t resist asking him to create a second “interview,” this time as a book trailer for Everyone Communicates, Few Connect. And the best part? I got to be in on the joke.

Here is the result:

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Isn’t that great? Tripp really captured my “essence,” didn’t he? (And I really hope the next printing of the book DOES have a scratch-n-sniff section.)

In addition to this promotional piece, the folks at Nelson also created a great webpage for the book. If you have a friend who would like to know more about Everyone Communicates, Few Connect, please feel free to point them in that direction.

And if you enjoyed Tripp’s hilarious sendup of me, you can find more of his writing and videos at his website, TrippCrosby.com.

Have a great weekend! I’m preaching in metro Atlanta, Georgia, Sunday. If you’re in the area, I’d love for you to join me at 12Stone Church.

Apr
23

20 Winners … and no losers!

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20 Winners!

It’s time to announce the winners of the Big Case Giveaway! On April 5, we launched it with these simple rules: leave a comment on that post describing how YOU would use 24 copies of ECFC. The publishers’ favorite 20 comments would WIN 24 copies (a case) of the books.

With all of your comments, you all didn’t make their job easy. In one week, readers left 1,090 comments, with some amazingly creative ideas. All I can say is that I’m glad I wasn’t a judge!

So without further ado, here are the winners, as chosen by staff at Thomas Nelson Publishers. Each will receive one case (24 copies) of Everyone Communicates, Few Connect. I’ve included the comment number along with each name. We’re also notifying all winners via email within the next week.

  1. #63 Tyler Hartley // Apr 5, 2010 at 4:32 pm
  2. #64 Deacon Bradley // Apr 5, 2010 at 4:32 pm
  3. #146 Iana // Apr 5, 2010 at 6:42 pm
  4. #165 Bryan Burt // Apr 5, 2010 at 8:21 pm
  5. #263 Sol Greear // Apr 6, 2010 at 8:38 am
  6. #266 Chaplain Steph // Apr 6, 2010 at 8:49 am
  7. #275 Linda // Apr 6, 2010 at 9:08 am
  8. #369 Steve Blair // Apr 6, 2010 at 1:33 pm
  9. #373 RJ Barros // Apr 6, 2010 at 1:36 pm
  10. #387 Diana M. // Apr 6, 2010 at 1:43 pm
  11. #568 Angelee Murray, Sales Director // Apr 7, 2010 at 11:06 am
  12. #593 Erica Pefferman // Apr 7, 2010 at 2:24 pm
  13. #724 Paul Gustavson // Apr 7, 2010 at 10:16 pm
  14. #766 Tracey Messick // Apr 8, 2010 at 1:06 pm
  15. #792 Sylvia Scott // Apr 8, 2010 at 11:28 pm
  16. #921 Maryann Garding // Apr 10, 2010 at 1:34 pm
  17. #989 Julia Muscari // Apr 11, 2010 at 7:44 pm
  18. #1016 Anton Gunn // Apr 11, 2010 at 8:18 pm
  19. #1077 Millie Rosado // Apr 11, 2010 at 10:53 pm
  20. #1081 Edwin Sarmiento // Apr 11, 2010 at 11:19 pm

Congratulations to all of you! Now what’s this about…

No Losers?

We were only able to choose 20 winners of a free case of books. But based on your overwhelming response, it’s clear that many of you value the message of Everyone Communicates, Few Connect and would love to share it with others.

So, as a special thank you to all of my blog readers, we’ve arranged for a limited-time discount on the book:

45% off the cover price!

That’s just $14.29/each.

This opportunity comes thanks to 800ceoread.com. They’re offering this special price from now until May 7, 2010.  If you are interested just CLICK HERE.

I hope this is helpful to you. Feel free to share this offer with anyone you think might benefit from it.

Thank you again for participating! Your ideas were amazing.

Remember to take advantage of this discount offer

from 800ceoread.com

between now and May 7, 2010.