Archive for Character
Knowing the difference between players and pretenders
Posted by: | CommentsIf you’ve ever led people, you’ve come across followers who would rather act the part than do their part. Those people are pretenders, and while they can sometimes masquerade as players, there are ways to tell the two apart. It’s important to find all the pretenders within an organization, because otherwise, they will steal momentum and damage relationships.
Here is my guiding principle: Pretenders look the part, talk the part, and claim the part, but fall short of fulfilling the part.
Here are some other specific differences:
1. Players have a servant’s mindset; pretenders have a selfish mindset.
Players do things for the benefit of others and the organization, while pretenders think only of benefitting themselves. A pretender is narrowly focused only on outcomes that are in his or her best interest.
2. Players are mission-conscious; pretenders are position-conscious.
Players will give up a position to achieve a mission. Pretenders will give up a mission to achieve a position. For players, the progress of the mission is much more important than their own place within it. But a pretender will value his or her position more highly than just about anything else.
3. Players can deliver the goods; pretenders only promise the goods.
A player is a team member who can be counted on to finish a task every time. The pretender will claim the ability to do so; but in the end, he or she does not consistently execute.
4. Players are job-happy: they love what they do and do it well. Pretenders are job-hunters: they can’t do what they do where they are but think they could do it better somewhere else.
For a player, the work is fulfilling and meaningful, and he or she is devoted to doing it well. The pretender is so focused on appearing competent that he or she cannot always BE competent. And again because of the focus on appearance, the pretender won’t admit fault when mistakes are made. Thus, he or she believes that problems are a part of the workplace, not him- or herself.
5. Players love to see others succeed; pretenders are only interested in their own success.
Rabbi Harold Kushner had a player’s mindset when he said, “The purpose of life is not to win. The purpose of life is to grow and to share. When you come to look back on all that you have done in life, you will get more satisfaction from the pleasure you have brought into other people’s lives than you will from the times that you outdid and defeated them.”
I think we all start out as competitors, but the goal is to grow past that. In my adult life, I have evolved from competitor, to personal achiever, to team player, and on to team builder. A player is happy when another member of the team succeeds because it benefits all. The pretender sees success as a win-lose proposition, and resents it when another person “wins.”
6. Players value integrity; pretenders value image.
In navigation, the rule is that what’s under the surface should be heavier than what’s above the surface. Otherwise, ship will capsize in a storm. Integrity is like this; what’s under the surface had better be greater than that which is in plain sight. A player can be counted on to do the right thing, even if nobody is looking. Pretenders may only do the right thing when others are looking, and whatever is expedient when others are not.
7. Players make the hard choices; pretenders make the easy choices.
We all have the power of choice, but once used, our choice has power over us. What is a hard choice? With a hard choice, the price is paid on the front end; the payoff only comes later. Few people gather to affirm the hard choice, and it almost always includes risk. And the hard choice usually places others and the organization above self. Peter Drucker once said, “Whenever you see a successful business, someone once made a courageous decision.” Players aren’t afraid to make those decisions.
8. Players finish well; pretenders fade out.
Some people start as players, but at some point they turn into pretenders. Why? I believe it’s because they overestimate the event and underestimate the process. They make the choice to begin, but they get tired of the work it takes to continue. Or they begin and proceed until they are confronted with the need to change. Unwilling to do that, they begin pretending in order to get by. A player takes all tasks to completion.
Do you have a better idea of who the players and pretenders are within your team or organization? Remember that players will always ADD to the team’s efforts. But pretenders, at least in the long run, will COST the team. Knowing the difference between the two means that you’ll count on the right person to get the job done.
What I’m Reading, Winter 2011
Posted by: | CommentsAs winter arrives here in the US, I find that it’s the perfect time of year to stay indoors and read a good book. And since I’m always reading books to continue to grow personally, this seemed like the perfect time of year to share with you WHAT I’m reading. The following are books I’ve read recently and recommend:
The Leadership Secrets of Billy Graham, by Harold Myra
The Mackay MBA of Selling in the Real World, by Harvey Mackay
How to Run Your Business by The Book:
A Biblical Blueprint to Bless Your Business,
By Dave Anderson
The Leadership Ellipse: Shaping How We Lead by Who We Are
By Robert Fryling & Eugene H. Peterson
Let’s talk about HONOR
Posted by: | CommentsWhat do you think of when you hear the word, HONOR? Respect, recognition, reward, position? Or is it something else? Today’s post features a Minute with Maxwell on HONOR. See what I think of when I hear it:
If you’re having difficulty viewing the video, try clicking here or here.
The Minute with Maxwell is a free daily coaching video, delivered by email to you every morning. Subscribing is as easy as filling out the following form:
Also, any day this week, if you go to the direct link for a video and comment there, you’ll be entered for a free signed copy of The 5 Levels of Leadership! Sign up today to start receiving new videos in your inbox.
From my files: Integrity
Posted by: | CommentsGreetings from another hemisphere! As you read this, I’m in South Africa speaking to thousands of people about leadership. (See Events in the sidebar for details.)
For today’s post, I thought I’d do something a little different. Over the years, many people have asked me how I find so much information and material for my teaching. I answer that I’ve been filing it all away since I was a young adult. In case you’re unclear on how old I am, that’s a lot of years that I’ve been filing. (And if you want more info on how I file, read this post.)
At this point in the conversation, the more strategic questioners have one thing to say:
“Wow. I wish I could see those files.”
So this week on the blog, I thought I’d give you a glimpse at what I file. I’m opening up one file drawer and sharing some of my quote collection with you. I hope it inspires and encourages you.
On Integrity
Integrity is: Doing what you said you would do, when you said you would do it, and how you said you would do it. –Byrd Baggett
Always believe what a person does, not what he says. –Fred Smith
One of the primary rules of navigation is this: What’s under the surface should carry more weight than what’s above the surface if the ship is going to make it through storms without capsizing. That’s exactly how it is with integrity. What’s under the surface had better be greater than what you’re showing to the world, or you’re never going to make it through the storms of life. –Pat Williams
Wisdom is knowing the right path to take … Integrity is taking it. –MH McKee
People of integrity expect to be believed. They also know time will prove them right and are willing to wait. –Ann Landers
Watch what direction the feet point, when the mouth stops. You want a consistency between mouth and movement. –James Dignam
Integrity is keeping my commitment even if the circumstances when I made the commitment have changed. –David Jeremiah
Personal integrity is important, not because it gets us what we want, but because it helps us be what we want. –Michael Josephson
A man of character will make himself worthy of any position he is given. –Mahatma Gandhi
Integrity without knowledge is weak and useless, and knowledge without integrity is dangerous and dreadful. –Samuel Johnson
Real integrity is doing the right thing, knowing that nobody’s going to know whether you did it or not. –Oprah Winfrey
The time is always right to do what is right. -Martin Luther King, Jr.
Integrity is not a 90% thing, not a 95% thing; either you have it or you don’t. –Peter Scotese
Integrity has no need of rules. –Albert Camus
In order to be a leader a man must have followers. And to have followers, a man must have their confidence. Hence the supreme quality for a leader is unquestionably integrity. Without it, no real success is possible, no matter whether it is on a section gang, a football field, in an army, or in an office. If a man’s associates find him guilty of phoniness, if they find that he lacks forthright integrity, he will fail. His teachings and actions must square with each other. –Dwight D Eisenhower
Build your relationships on the solid ground of TRUST
Posted by: | Comments“To be trusted is a greater compliment than to be loved.”
~George MacDonald
In the Law of Solid Ground in my 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership, I asserted that trust is the foundation of leadership. But that’s not all. In reality, trust is necessary in ALL good relationships. Good marriages, business relationships, and friendships all require trust. Without it, there can be no open and honest interaction, and the relationship will be only temporary.
How do you gain the trust of others?
Manchester, Inc, a consulting firm in Philadelphia, used a survey of more than 200 companies to discover the best ways for leaders to build trust with employees. They found that people who engender trust…
- Maintain integrity.
- Openly communicate vision and values.
- Show respect for employees as equal partners.
- Focus on shared goals rather than personal agendas.
- Do the right thing regardless of personal risk.
- Listen with an open mind.
- Demonstrate compassion.
- Maintain confidences.
In addition to this helpful list, I would add that a critical way to GAIN trust is to be willing to GIVE trust.
Former US Secretary of State Henry L. Stimson remarked, “The chief lesson I have learned in a long life is that the only way you can make a man trustworthy is by trusting him; and the surest way to make him untrustworthy is to distrust him and show your distrust.”
Haven’t you found that to be true of yourself? We all want to be trusted. And by taking the leap of faith to trust in someone, you give them a gift that they usually want to repay.
As you strive to invest confidence in others in the same way you would like it invested in you, take comfort in the words of Camillo Benso di Cavour, who said, “The man who trusts men will make fewer mistakes than he who distrusts them.”
Adapted from Ethics 101





