We are all failures – at least, all the best of us are.
~James Barrie, author of Peter Pan
This is one of the many thoughts and quotes that I’ve been posting on Twitter this week on the subject of failure. Some others:
There are many ways to be a winner, but only one way to be a loser:
to fail & not look beyond the failure. ~Kyle Rote, Jr
I truly believe that the difference between average people & achieving people is their perception of & response to failure.
Let me illustrate from my own life with this:
The March 2009 cover of Success Magazine.
***
That was quite a cover. They made me look so SUCCESSFUL.
And the article? Well, it was so good that my wife Margaret read it and asked who it was talking about. 
Ten months ago, you could find this issue on quite a few newsstands. Walk into just about any airport, and you’d see my smiling “successful” face.
*
*
*
Now, let’s just contrast that amazingly flattering magazine cover with the photo that follows.
Only weeks after the Success Magazine hit newsstands,
a very different photo was taken of me…
coincidentally, IN an airport:
Yes, that IS a mug shot. Yes, I AM an idiot.
On March 13, 2009, I was arrested at my local airport.
What for? Well, probably the best thing is for you to read what I wrote right here on this blog when it happened.
If you don’t know the story, you need to see this. Today I intend to “raise the bar” on stupid for anyone who’s ever made a mistake. Go read it; I’ll wait.
***
Okay, welcome back.
Yes, it’s all true. In one instant, I went from celebrity shot to mug shot. From the penthouse to the outhouse, so to speak. Now, the good news is that ten months later, everything has worked out okay. And thanks to my friends and family – who seem to have seen my embarrassment as an answer to prayer – I’ve learned to laugh at my stupidity.
(Who else’s friends deal with their own mistakes by proclaiming, “Well, at least I didn’t try to take a GUN into an AIRPORT”?)
Here’s the truth: I’m convinced that I’m not the only one who’s done something stupid. In fact, I believe that ALL of us are just one step away from stupid. We walk a fine line. And whether our failure is a bad decision or a stupid mistake, we need to learn the right ways to respond to it.
In the last few months, I’ve taught a few lessons on failure and the best ways to handle and learn from it. Click the underlined titles to go listen and/or view them online.
Failing Forward, on Robert Schuller’s Television Hour of Power
Famous Failures, a series of three messages preached at Christ Fellowship Church (CFC), West Palm Beach, Florida
(This link takes you to all sermon archives. Click on “Famous Failures” to view/listen to my 3 specific sermons. The first, Stupid Hurts, will update you on my airport experience.)
I hope that if you’re dealing with your own failures, mistakes, or foolish choices, you’ll find some guidance and encouragement in viewing or listening to them.
And now I’ll close with just two of the many book titles suggested to me after this incident:
The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Airport Security
and
Developing the Gangsta Within You
49 responses so far ↓
1 Dan Rockwell // Jan 28, 2010 at 9:23 pm
Ok John, I’m not sure but it sounds like your encouraging stupidity?? But I guess we don’t need much encouragement do we. I find a willingness to make mistakes so troubling because of loss of credibility. And in a team leadership setting I find the team struggles to launch out when the fear of failure looms large. Thanks again for your work
Leadership Freak,
Dan Rockwell
2 Emily // Jan 28, 2010 at 9:35 pm
Developing the Gangsta Within You?!?!?!?! HAHAHAHAHA!!! Dude that’s so bom!!! I would totally read it…
On a more serious note; thanks for not pretending to be perfect just cause you’re a big leader dude. I hope I have that kind of humility as I fail forward through life.
Thanks for your example.
3 Sam // Jan 28, 2010 at 9:46 pm
John,
Thanks for sharing this personal story. Its amazing and everyone can learn from it!
You’ve been a blessing.
Sam
4 Shawn Kostiuk (MinistryGeek) // Jan 28, 2010 at 9:52 pm
Mistakes happen. That is why we are instructed to get up and keep moving forward. Where would we be if our ancestors gave up and where will our children be if we simply give in to our own “lapses of the synapses.”
5 Carlester // Jan 28, 2010 at 10:10 pm
Mr. Maxwell – Thanks for being so transparent. Maybe you should do a re-write of your ethics book and title it, There’s No Such Thing as Cool Stupidity… There’s Only Stupidity!
6 Nora Zarate Hodges // Jan 28, 2010 at 10:12 pm
Years ago, I used to carry a stun gun. I knew it had to be packed in the checked baggage but I always put this in my purse when I arrived at my destination and back in my suitcase before going home. On the way home, I forgot and when I got to airport security I remembered. I told them and they went ballistic. They wanted to arrest me. I was fortunate to be able to talk them out of it but it was quite a stressful event in my life. I feel for you.
7 jayson Pagan // Jan 28, 2010 at 10:12 pm
Such is the course of humanity! It has been because of the greatness of my failures and “stupidities” that I have known the limitlessness and awe of God’s mercy and love. Sometimes I’m like that bird, FLYING HIGH, got the world by the tail and then WHAM!!- I hit a glass window. WOW, didn’t see that one coming!
8 Jenn // Jan 28, 2010 at 10:19 pm
John I loved you and your work before and now I love you even more. I believe that this “failure” the enemy might use for bad God will use for good in teaching us about dusting ourselves off and keep on keeping on and fighting the good fight. Now a days with big exes and leaders politicians lying and trying to deflect it is an honorable thing call it as it is. That is truly a sign of leadership and integrity. I applauded you. Stay strong and
may God use this in mighty way for those of us who have made mistakes!!
9 Barb Giglio // Jan 28, 2010 at 10:24 pm
I have to say, I love reading all the posts! #112, especially….great advice to go to the shooting range!!
lol Experiences like this are such an eye opener of what goes on in this world, don’t you think? My son is a police officer. My oldest daughter was one for three years. My son was a Sheriff and worked at the jail for about six months and hated every minute of it, and went back to being a police officer. My husband and two daughters have jail stories too, “imagine”, so I could relate with yours. (Oldest daughter turned out being a police officer at 21 yrs old.) From listening to their experience of “jail” and also reading yours it really makes one wonder why would anyone ever want to go back through that experience! Even innocent people get to have such experiences, makes me laugh… can’t help it! 
I wish you could hear our stories… lol ! God uses everything for good. Listened to one of your teachings already and look forward to listening to others you have posted. Want to say “thank you” again for sharing all you share and especially allowing people see you as a down to earth, normal person with life experiences that most don’t want to admit they have. Again, you “connect” with so many! Can’t wait for the book to come out in March!!!! 
Barb Giglio
10 Miguel Solis // Jan 28, 2010 at 10:25 pm
How about “Put your gun to the test” That’s the reason of the airplane in the cover? Just kidding.
11 Jose Garcia // Jan 28, 2010 at 10:39 pm
John you are one of the best leaders that I know, keep doing what you are doing. God bless you.
12 Mitzi // Jan 28, 2010 at 10:42 pm
Great story! Thanks for sharing the highs and lows of being John Maxwell. I appreciate you. I’ve plenty of “stupid” stories that I can finally laugh at as well. So, did your wife get her gift?
13 Buddy // Jan 28, 2010 at 11:04 pm
That’s hilarious. I had a similar incident with a hollowed out hand grenade one time. Thankfully I didn’t end up in jail.
14 Shalini // Jan 29, 2010 at 12:47 am
Dear John,
You have always been my favorite and I look forward for your write-ups all the time. But this blog has been like a great encouragement for me. When you read about something like this from successful people like you it conveys to err us human. I love the humility in you. And I’ve learnt a lot from you and made ammendments in my self.
Thanks and God bless you
15 Brodwyn // Jan 29, 2010 at 2:14 am
mmm… making mistakes, saying something foolish, embarrassing ourselves… some of us really have a hard time dealing with that. We beat ourselves up and play the movie in our head over and over again. I know I’ve been guilty of that many times. It’s a great topic to give direction on, John, ‘coz so many of us deal so negatively with it. We need courage to do the right thing and pick ourselves up, learn and move on. As I once heard: “Take what you do very seriously, but don’t take yourself so seriously!” We must have the courage to laugh at ourselves.
16 Mindi // Jan 29, 2010 at 3:26 am
Many people are facing great disasters in their personal financial lives at this time because of one bad decision. It is healing to hear of a leader who admits a stupid mistake. Humility is expensive, but incredibly valuable. It always sets us up for the next thing God has planned for us.
17 Most Tweeted Articles by Leadership Development Experts // Jan 29, 2010 at 5:31 am
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18 Bob Garbett // Jan 29, 2010 at 5:36 am
I think one of the greatest mistakes in leadership is to pretend perfection. It results in blaming others and an inflated ego.
The transparency you are teaching – and modeling – here is the key to authentic leadership.
And, I would definitely read “Developing the Gangsta Within You!” lol
19 Douglas McCarty // Jan 29, 2010 at 5:52 am
If it wasn’t for airport security, that handgun would probably still be in that bag. Who knows what would have came of it then? How many mistakes do we make that we don’t know about because no one confronted or challenged us? In Dr. Maxwell’s book, “Putting your Dreams to the Test”, Dr. Maxwell speaks about an experience he had with a new assistant. He asked his new assistant to “Look-up” a phone number. He was displeased when she came back a few minutes later saying she could not find it. Well, Dr. Maxwell did the work for her as she watched and learn the expectations of her task. The work actually involved making a number of other phone calls to achieve finding someone who knew the number to the desired contact. The task took much more than a few minutes. To me, and and most people, that’s not a ‘look-up’, that’s ‘research’. Dr. Maxwell never asked his new assistant to ‘research’ the number. That’s his mistake, not hers. When I delegate tasks, I do my very best to communicate the scope of the task, the desired results, and (usually) how long the task is expected to take. Otherwise, it’s my failure.
20 Sharon // Jan 29, 2010 at 7:54 am
Great post, Mr. Maxwell! Stupid teaches a lot (if we’ll let it). Not only our own stupidity, but also others. But man…. taking a gun into the airport! Oh my, horrifying! That had to be horrible. I’m assumimg that you might have missed your flight? :9)
21 Andy Perkins // Jan 29, 2010 at 7:57 am
Wow, I needed this today. Working through some leadership decision blunders. Thanks.
22 Nora // Jan 29, 2010 at 8:39 am
Thanks. I feel much much better. hahahaa
23 Leonard Smith // Jan 29, 2010 at 9:26 am
Thank you very much,God Bless
24 Rony // Jan 29, 2010 at 10:52 am
Bueno, todos los días se aprende…
Gracias por mostrarte tal cual eres sin pretender ser alguien más, eso nos enseña muchísimo al igual que tus seminarios y libros… Dios te bendiga hoy y siempre!!!
25 Alison Gitelson // Jan 29, 2010 at 11:00 am
Your book “Failing Forward” is one of my all time favourites. When one leads a team in such a way that they can and do fail forward the results are so exciting.
26 Camnio // Jan 29, 2010 at 11:24 am
thanks for showing the human side of you.
27 Ann // Jan 29, 2010 at 12:43 pm
Oh wow — those books at the end or hilarious!! We are all human — even celebrities!
I appreciate your honesty and everything you do.
Always an admirer,
Ann
28 NoLimit // Jan 29, 2010 at 12:51 pm
Wow!!!!I’m glad all went well eventually…
I guess at the end of the day,what matters is how we deal with failure not the failure itself…afterall it isn’t a destination.
29 Nancye Ricketts // Jan 29, 2010 at 2:40 pm
Some time ago when my sister was a young attorney in a big law firm, she was traveling with one of the big bosses. At the airport a very long knife was discovered in her briefcase. She was so embarrassed. It had been used to cut an office birthday cake weeks before and she’d put it back in the briefcase and forgot it. Fortunately, the airport security personnel believed her story. Her boss was quite upset though. Did she feel stupid at the time? Yes of course! Did she stop riding on airplanes. No! But she does look through her bags.
30 Mark Rivera // Jan 29, 2010 at 2:42 pm
John, I got a laugh out of this but was relieved and touched to hear that everything is alright. I also am really blessed to read of your transperency which I think every leader needs in these days that we live in. Thank you for your ministry and being an example to all of us. You certainly are keeping honest with yourself and the rest of us failures as well.
31 J.T. Burton // Jan 29, 2010 at 4:22 pm
Thanks for letting us know you are “regular” people! Love your books…YOU are my favorite!
32 Trey Bynum // Jan 29, 2010 at 6:17 pm
Thanks for this John – you’ve helped me learn that it’s okay to fail – but to fail forward. And, I know it’s okay to make a mistake every now and again. I’m not perfect – and it’s okay! Thanks again!
33 Brian Pharis // Jan 29, 2010 at 9:09 pm
Failure probably yields success in a greater yield than does carefully planned steps of success.
Of course if we are humble enough to examine our failure and implement change.
John – I’m in Pickerington, OH – I believe you started pastoring a church and growing up as a young boy near Lancaster, OH?
Who would have thought Fairfield County would produce the author of leadership – John Maxwell, and the voice for the nation – Rod Parsley
lovng the blog
34 david seow // Jan 29, 2010 at 10:42 pm
Hi, John
thanks for sharing.
Know your failure, learn from failure
and you will succeed.
Chinese old saying:
失败是成功之母- failure will lead to success
35 Lynn Leech // Jan 30, 2010 at 3:23 am
*big smile*… you have no idea how much I needed to know I am not the only one…lol…it’s been a tough week for me in leadership… found out I have been failing some of my team…was a major learn for me..spent a day in tears realising I had not been all I could have been for committed members… John… thank you… again!
36 Nicholas // Jan 30, 2010 at 8:23 am
Hey brother John, Great story. Here in Japan we have a saying “even monkeys fall from trees”. You’re a blessing all around.
We love you…!
37 John Phillips // Jan 30, 2010 at 2:54 pm
This article brings out one of the reasons why your ministry and insights are so helpful to me. Your human, vulnerable and teachable. Thanks for letting us in to see the process.
Blessings to you!
John
38 Jenna Culbertson // Jan 30, 2010 at 5:20 pm
Thanks so much for sharing. It’s nice to know there is someone famous who is willing to step up when making a mistake and say “I did something stupid.” Glad it all turned out okay.
39 Yvonne Green // Jan 30, 2010 at 10:11 pm
Thanks for the story
In so many ways you remind me of Joyce Meyer
man she just gets up there and tells on herself.
40 Cheryl A. Pullins // Jan 31, 2010 at 12:06 am
There are so many lessons to be learned when one is transparent with the students!
41 thekenyannutcase // Jan 31, 2010 at 10:30 am
“developing the gansta within”HAHAHA
totally cool title.will definitely buy it to add to my leadership collection of your books which i cherish.thks for what you do.
42 Taralyn Ayende // Jan 31, 2010 at 2:01 pm
This is a really good blog! And Congratulations on the Success Magazine! I will refer all my friends to this site and this specific blog! Thanks for sharing and being transparent.
43 Preston Lawrence // Feb 1, 2010 at 10:21 pm
It is amazing how the situations that occur in our lives, can minister to others. Your sermon on your situation that I watched on the Christ fellowship website touched me. I am also glad to see that not only do you write great books but you live what you write.
44 Ukens visdomsord – forskjellen mellom middelmådighet og suksess | Big man going down // Feb 2, 2010 at 4:02 am
[...] (http://johnmaxwellonleadership.com/2010/01/28/on-success-and-stupidity-take-two/) [...]
45 Edward G. Gallegos // Feb 2, 2010 at 11:55 am
My wife and I have a running joke……….She’s perfect and I make all the mistakes…………I hate to say it, but she’s right most of the time……
Thanks for your candor, its refreshing to know that you’re just like us in every way………
46 Pinkan Chrisnindia // Feb 2, 2010 at 8:06 pm
I have just done very very something stupid
*____*
Very learn from this.
Thank you John.
47 Elinar Davidian // Feb 9, 2010 at 2:47 am
John,
It’s an honor to have you as a mentor and trainer and also so great to see you on the cover of Success magazine.
I’ve been learning from your audio’s provided by Success.
48 Lisa Thorne // Feb 10, 2010 at 8:52 am
John, You’re a SCREAM!
49 Julia Pickslay // Feb 10, 2010 at 8:10 pm
John,
I always appreciated you as my pastor at Skyline being so transparent – it’s good to see nothing has changed. You are a constant inspiration to me in both my business and personal life.
Thanks for sharing…and maybe you should use that pic on the Christmas card for 2010!