What do YOU think I need to say about communication?
ByAre you ready to help me make my next book better?
Thank you again for all the suggestions you made about future books you’d like to see me write. In two recent posts I addressed a few of the ideas that I received from you and pointed out the books I’ve already written that answer some of your questions.
But there was one more topic for which I got a lot of requests. Here’s just a sampling:
- I would love to see you write a book on communication.
- Perhaps you could write on communicating clearly, assumptions and perceptions
- What about leadership and communication? There is so much to say yet about this topic, and this is really decisive in leadership.
- I am not sure how much you have already written about how leaders communicate, but that seems very relevant!
If one of these was your question (or if you would just like to know what I have to say regarding communication) I have good news:
I HAVE in fact written a book dedicated to the topic. It’s called Everyone Communicates, Few Connect.
The secret to communication — whether one-on-one, in a small group, to an audience, or in a meeting — is connecting. If you can connect with people, you can communicate with people. This is something I learned early in my career, and it has helped me as a husband, father, friend, communicator, and leader. I cannot image what my life and my career might have looked like had I not learned how to connect.
What? You haven’t heard of this book? I’m not surprised. Because it hasn’t been published yet! And believe it or not, that’s even better news. Why? Because you, my blog readers, will get to see it before anyone else does. You’ll also get a chance to tell me what you think about it before it goes to print. And if you give me a story in response to one of my chapters that adds enough value to it, I’ll even include it in the published book!
Here’s the plan. On September 1, 2009, I will post the first chapter of this manuscript right here on the blog. I’ll encourage you to give me your feedback and comments. While the chapter is up, you’ll be able to tell me exactly what you like, what you don’t like, and what you think is missing. We’ll make changes based on the feedback that we believe will add value to the book. And if we use your comment or story , we’ll also quote you in the book.
We’ll leave that first chapter up for two weeks; after that, we’ll take it down and post the next chapter. From then on, we’ll post a new chapter each week for you to read and comment on.
A chapter will stay up only a week, so keep in contact. If you think you’ll have trouble remembering to check each week, then subscribe to my RSS feed so that you receive a reminder. I need your input as part of the revision and editing process. And when the book comes out in the spring of 2010, you can check to see whose comments made it into the book.
I’m really excited about this process. Every book I’ve written over the last decade and a half has been a collaborative experience. I’ve sought the advice of good thinkers and leaders as I’ve outlined and written. (After all, one person can do nothing of significance alone.) But this is the first time I’ll be able to connect so broadly with my readers before a book has been published. I know you will make the book better.
So get ready. This fall is going to be a lot of fun!
I think this is a great idea and I can’t wait to read it!
I look forward to reading all your books….and I think this is a super idea. Thanks for all you do Dr. John. See you at Exchange.
John,
I can’t wait to read this book!
If I could request topics for you to cover, they would be:
Communicating the explicit intent of a message – both good & bad
How to handle disagreements… it is ok to agree to disagree
How to humbly accept an apology when someone else was wrong… getting these words correct is vital.
Can’t wait!
Amazing idea! I cann’t wait
Thank you
This has got to be the most courageous act of an author John. I have read most of your books and love them. You have been an inspiration for us church leaders. This really shows that you are secure in what you do. Congratulations. Eugene
Cool stuff! I’m excited about your new book. Looking forward to participating!
That’s exciting news, John! I’m really looking forward to reading it. This is a critically important topic that I don’t see addressed often (or at least not well). Thanks for ‘connecting’ with this innovative step
– Larry
that’s great, Sir. I’m excited to read it…
Absolutely great! It will have deep impact for every people who want to grow as Christ’s Ambassador.
What a great idea – I’m looking forward to it. Would it be ok to potentially share my stories both, in English and Spanish?
This is Stephanie, the blog administrator. Eduardo asked about sharing in Spanish. I think that’s a wonderful idea. I speak Spanish and can translate from either Spanish or Portuguese to English. If you wish to comment in either of those languages, please feel free. I will translate as soon as I can get to it.
As for other languages…. I’m sorry, but two’s my limit, at least for now. (Although I can muddle my way through Italian.)
working on my own webiste. You know this one well. Twitter is great – but once again – it is not about communication it is about connection. Reminds me now of the tower of Babel! we have a bunch of people speaking all in different languages. If we could speak the same or be channeled to areas easily that would add value to our own dreams and pursuits – like before God struck the ‘building project’ and they all spoke the same language! hum, (remember the coma (,); Selah ~ pause and contemplate. For us who know Christ as Savior. Prayer is definately the pre-requisite for this answer! Faith without works is dead! Great idea and what potential – to tap into the POWER OF COMMUNICATION. Can’t wait John! You are #4 – the designated hitter & I already know this is going to be a home run! The voice of Truth… that is what I will listen too – & so will you, as you are the anointed ‘messenger’! Watching you on Joyce Meyer! Awesome. I’ve followed you SO LONG! & you’ve met me many times. See me at CF Royal Palm & zoesinger on Twitter. My prayer is that I can add value to you! & to your book. That would be my honor; & if there be any praise? Well, that goes to Jesus!
Great idea! This will be a lot of fun. Can’t wait for Chapter 1!
Looking forward to the new book !! I am currently re-reading “Thinking for a Change” and loving every minute of it. Thank you so much for what you do and for being such an awesome messenger to the Body of Christ and to the world. Simply wonderful.
Awesome!
I enjoy all of your writings so looking forward to this.
Wow, what an honor; but I’m not surprised. This is why you’re such a trusted leader. I’m looking forward to it.
I’m so excited to read this news book. It will help me a lot. God bless you always. Go!!! I’m so excited!
[...] What do YOU think I need to say about communication [John Maxwell] [...]
John, love this approach to writing a book…
In response to what to cover:-
One thing I see a lot is People who want to communicate something (the Sender) ‘broadcasting’ a message to the people they want to communicate with (the Hearers)and thinking they have communicated. Then comes the surprise when the Hearer’s behaviour doesn’t align to the Sender’s expectation.
To compound this the mistake of the Sender is to presume fault on the part of the Listeners! – there are a few payoffs for the SEnder however.
1/ no change is required on the part of the Sender – they’re not at fault of course
2/ The Sender can then make examples of the Listeners who ‘failed’ to understand or ‘deliberately ignored’ the message.
A perspective I try to help people use is that:
communication hasn’t happened until the message has been understood, the values have been adopted and the purpose owned.
A sure way to do this is to validate with the Listener what they think the Sender said and what actions they will take that helps the Sender achieve the result they wanted.
I guess another way of looking at Communication is the logistics of moving a value, goal, emotion from one heart to another.
After all community is the beginning of communication.
Sounds like you had a great time at Riverside.
Have a great day and look forward to the book.
Mike
John, thanks for including us….can’t wait to read Chapter 1….keep up the great work, you have impacted my life immensely through your writings….may God use you to touch many more…..Blessings to you, my friend…..Rick
May I suggest that you take the connection theme beyond to you and your book and on to your readers. By creating an online environment where we can talk to one another about each chapter, rather than just submit personal comments, we can learn how to apply the principles you’ll be sharing with us. Thank you.
I think this is going to be alot of fun. I am an agent wtih NAA and we have a leadership study group that is going book by book on your leadership principles. This will be a great addition for us in the fall.
We at NAA think alot of your leadership teachings Mr. Maxwell. See you in September at our leadership conference.
Looking forward to it! Great idea!
Sounds like a great idea, I look forward to it. Maybe you could write a book about writing someday.
Communication is VITAL!
It’s the old – HOW, WHERE, WHEN we
COMMUNICATE.
Yes-( as stated above) – Validate, is important.
Look forward to the NEW book with excitement.
Blessings
So excited to read the first Chapter! I am teaching organizational leadership at the undergraduate level and would like to implement more on the topic of Communication into the major. This book will be a “must read” for my students!
In this day of electronic communication, I think any discussion should include the direction that some communication should always be done face-to-face. Rule of thumb can be if you feel the need to end your communication with “do you understand?” or “see what I mean?” They probably need to SEE you to see what you mean.
Non-verbal communication does not always go through social media well.
Hello John,
Thank you for allowing us to share in your project. I praise God for you.
Just a couple of weeks ago I had a discussion with my father and sister regarding communication. My father was giving some fatherly advice.
We all came from different occupation and now I’m a leader in ministry.
My father is a retired police officer, my sister work in the chemical manufacture industry, and I worked in corporate America. Three different forms of communication was programmed; as an officer he had more of an controlling posture, and in manufacturing because of the size of the building and noise factor there were fewer things they are offended about. But in corporate America it closed door to most discussion.
And as leaders we have to face some of these adverse programmings and/or to reprogram to get the optimal message across. Or to help them to better communicators in all environments.
Wow, i was reading this and thinking, “i might have to get this book”, and dreading making the decision, as books, to me, sometimes become a commitment.
But if the chapters are online, that answers that problem. And we get to comment on it? What could be better. Thanx John, i hope this becomes a fruitful endeavor for everybody involved.
Thanks John!! Its would be an honor to read the first chapter. You are a trusted leader thank for all your hard work.
George
Well it looks to me, John, that you need to write a book that lists all the possible topics that have been suggested and connect them to books you have already published….sort of a “Maxwell on Leadership Catelogue” of sorts. Simplar to your Leadership Gold….all the nuggets, but more of a directory style! After all, you are already matching the topics to titles now….how hard would it be to make it a hardcover?
This is too cool John! What I think you should say about communication is that much consideration must be given to “Felt” needs, personality differences, and that done well, great communication brings out the best in people.
Dear Mr Maxwell. I am excited about the book on communication. I would like to know how we can communicate effectively in an organisation with multiple layers of leadership positions. And how our communication can build unity. Thank you.
Greetings from Africa! id really love to hear what leaders can learn about body language and non verbal communication in general especially in team dynamics. great idea
great idea…hop u have talked how to handle folks who just wont listen..how do you connect with them,plus do you have to always repeat a point over and over coz i believe people r different in understanding!
Love to be a part of this next book. I already have some content to share.
I do not know if you have covered this subject but once an area of deficiency has been dicussed with a team member and their response is not up to par what is a responsible path to follow as a leader? Thanks.
This is a great idea. Looking forwardto participating.
I enjoy reading your books! I can’t wait to read the finished product of your new one. You are awesome!
John,
First of all I love your books, and have been to a Mary Kay event in which you spoke. I was honored to have been in your presence.
What I would like to see in a book about communication is How do you say things in the right way? I have always said what comes off the top of my head, which hasn’t worked so well. I don’t know how to say things in the right way to communicate how I feel without getting defensive if someone doesn’t see what I am trying to say. When I say things they come across as being hateful or harsh, although I know sometimes I have done this with that intention because I was upset but there are times I haven’t meant to be like that at all. I don’t like confrontation and I let people run over me because I don’t know how to stand for myself.(my fear is I will say the wrong thing and make someone mad so I don’t say anything, which in return I just stuff my feelings and that is not healthy at all.
I don’t have a problem writing a letter because I seem to be able to communicate well when I am writing, but when face to face sometimes I want to run. I can’t wait for this book to come out, you are a answer to prayer. I love all your works
Hi Mr Maxwell, haven’t read any book of yours yet but I’d be delighted to see that you cover the principle of ‘mirroring’ – I believe if one can mirror someone accurately you have truly connected with that person and the rest is a matter of Grace and time…
I’ll be following your journey, all the best and may you be Blessed to be a blessing!
Regards
WS
Everyone communicates few connect a great title. Very exciting to hear about your new book and the input of your readers. It’s already a success. Praise the Lord was a total pleasure you and the Crouchs work so well together, lots of good points about achieving your dream. It is all about balance, in reaching any goal of life. Loved your Joel Porter story very powerful and a great reminder of how important family is. It is so true that we are either preparing or repairing and today matters and so does your daily agenda. Well done.
wow ! such a great idea, John ! Will be so exciting give feedback to you and collaborate with this cool book ! Looking forward to help you!
(I guess I may share cool stories in spanish and english to you)
Peace !
(I’m just learning
so, sorry, I know my english isn’t very good)
Sir, You are doing a great job for us to grow daily as a leader. I look forward to buy and read of more of your work. Thanks for raising and developing leaders around the globe.
I think you’re right-on with the concept of connecting as an essential part of communication.
At my job, I have a supervisor whose biggest responsibility is to communicate with me throughout the year. I have bi-weekly reports, monthly meetings, and frequent drop-bys — all of the things suggested by management-folks — but our communications constantly fall short of anything meaningful. In response, I keep our conversations short and never seek my supervisors attention — preferring to work around him for anything important. It’s obvious we don’t connect.
Dr. Maxwell– your work has influenced me greatly. You have the gift of sharing keen insights and making them simple. I have suggestions I would like to see in your writing.
How about communicating with different cultures and seizing the moment in America today. Numerous cultural groups are having difficulties in communicating their thoughts, message to the audience. How can some basic principles and reflections can make you an effective communicator today. I am a Latina born and raised in USA. I wanted to keep my beliefs in family, faith and cultural norms but often encoutered challenges when I started to intergrate in the main stream culture. A complicated subject but often overlooked. I hope this can be a chapter in your book. A great teacher and I will see you in person soon.
God Bless!
John Great idea! I’ll be here reading. Hopefully I can contribute a little too
Please forgive going to capslock mode…I physically need to.
I WORK FOR THE BIGGEST TELECOMMUNICATIONS INDUSTRY IN THE WORLD. I WAS TEMPORARILY PROMOTED TO A MANAGEMENT TITLE WITH EXCELLENT RESULTS. MY TEAM ROSE FROM POWER RANK 177 TO 58 IN 6 MONTHS WHILE I WAS MANAGING; EXPONENTIAL GROWTH! BECAUSE MY TEAM DID NOT WORK FOR ME, I WORKED FOR THEM.
COMPANY’S RE-ORGANIZATION DIRECTIVE RESULTED IN MY DEMOTION DUE TO OTHER MANAGERS’ HAVING “PERM” STATUS” AND MY MANAGER TEARED UP AS HE NOTIFIED ME. “I WOULD BE THE NEXT TO BE BROUGHT BACK UP. ” I WAS THE HARDEST DECISION FOR HIM TO MAKE. HIS “HANDS WERE TIED.” NO PERM STATUS MANAGERS WERE TO BE ON “THE LIST”.
SINCE THEN, 2 MGT. POSITIONS HAVE BEEN FILLED. IT WAS NOT ME.
I WAS NOT WELL LIKED BY THE PREVIOUS MANAGEMENT TEAM. MY POSITION WAS, AND CONTINUES TO BE, THAT AS A MANAGER, MY REP’S WERE MY CUSTOMERS AND MY JOB WAS TO HELP THEM DO THERE JOB. I WORKED FOR THEM.
IT HAS BEEN OVER 16 MONTHS AND I HAVE BECOME A UNION STEWARD AGAIN…SIMPLY BECAUSE I CANNOT SIT BY AS A BYSTANDER. I WANT TO PUT A STOP TO FEAR BASED MANAGEMENT.
I WAS ACTUALLY TOLD THAT MY DEGREE IN BUSINESS MANAGEMENT, DATED 1985, HAD NO VALUE BECAUSE IT WAS TOO OLD? EVEN THEN, THIS ANCIENT DEGREE KNEW THE MORALE BUSTING AFFECTS OF FEAR BASED MANAGEMENT. THE TITLE WAS “COACH LEADER”. THIS POSITION NEEDS TO BE RE-NAMED…THESE MANAGERS ARE NOT COACHING, THEY ARE ALL ABOUT HITTING THEIR NUMBERS.
MY FATHER WAS IN UPPER MGT. AND HE EXPLAINED THAT A CORPORATION HAS ZERO CONSIDERATION FOR THE INDIVIDUAL. HE WAS RIGHT. AND CORPORATE LAW SEEMS TO BE DRIVING THAT. MAKE THE MONEY. SCREW THE PEOPLE, THE ENVIRONMENT. “THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS A MINOR LAPSE OF INTEGRITY.”
I AM WITNESSING MANAGEMENT TACTICS THAT SHOW NO INTEGRITY OR ETHICS, IT IS ALL ABOUT THE BOTTOM LINE? WHEN A COMPANY POSTING $12.9 BILLION NET PROFITS, SHUTS DOWN THE MEDIA TO SILENCE THE TRUTH, WHILE THEY CLAIM “HARDSHIP” IN THE CURRENT ECONOMY IS CRIMINAL. [deleted] HAS EARNED IN EXCESS OF NET $6 BILLION SO FAR IN 2009…AND THEY CAN’T AFFORD TO???
I HAVE BEEN TOLD THAT I NEED TO STOP. I CAN’T “FIX” EVERYTHING. DOES THAT MEAN I SHOULD NOT TRY? [deleted] HAS SECURED A TOTAL MEDIA BLACKOUT SINCE OUR CONTRACT EXPIRED APRIL 4TH.
WE CURRENTLY HAVE A TENTATIVE AGREEMENT. I AM VERY CONCERNED THAT DURING THE LAST 4 MONTHS, NONE OF THE ACTIONS TO EDUCATE THE PUBLIC WERE MADE PUBLIC BECAUSE [deleted] PREVENTED THAT. HOW? WHAT HAPPENED TO FREEDOM OF SPEECH?
THIS IS DISHEARTENING AND SAD BECAUSE IF THIS COMPANY TRULY STOOD BY WHAT THEY WERE OFFERING TO THEIR EMPLOYEES, THEY WOULD NOT FEEL THE NEED TO HIDE IT FROM THE PUBLIC. FURTHERMORE, THE FACT THAT THE MEDIA CAN BE BOUGHT IS A MAJOR CAUSE OF CONCERN FOR EACH AND EVERY AMERICAN CITIZEN.
I THANK YOU FOR YOUR TIME AND ATTENTION,
GENUINELY,
KIM BUTTKE
John,
Thank you for this opportunity. One thing I find of interest about communication is that employees, friends, business associates, etc. will say they want more news or information. You spend long hours in researching, composing, rewriting, and finally publishing only to have no one read the document or text. Then you hear the old message, no one tells us anything.
So the issue I would like to learn from your next book is: how do we get the message across to those folks?
John, I have read most of your books. I have used and taught from your books. I have referred others to you and your writings. This goes back to your messages on “Focus on the Family” to last Sunday with your message on “The Hour of Power” at Crystal Cathedral. I had the opportunity to hear you live in Dunn, NC at the small Bible College several years ago.
Thank you for your words of wisdom and teaching of the Bible and leadership. They have helped me more than I will ever be able to express to you.
Blessings,
Doug
[...] mind works, but I was reading this weekend about John Maxwell’s new book project entitled Everyone Communicates, Few Connect. Now, to be honest, I think of “leadership gurus” like Maxwell as being some of the [...]